Because I worked as a package clerk as a kid, some 30 years ago. They spent a week training us to be cashiers and how to pack groceries as optimally and quickly as possible. And most places around here, the timing of the cashier is not good, especially since we usually have to pack our own groceries anyway.

"If" in one hand, shit in the other. Which fills up first?

You say it's not a thing anywhere else, but you also say it's easy to feel that way anywhere. Those two statements aren't congruent

[…] Me: "I don't work here"

This gives me big "ok boomer" vibes. Instead of this, imo, snarky response, could you not simply politely say that you prefer a human cashier?

Remember the human.

Self check out is faster especially since I can scan the items when I’m picking them off the shelves. The faster I can be outside and spend less time in those kind of commercial spaces the better. And no I don’t have agoraphobia. I just fucking hate the vibes of most stores.

What does that have to do with taking away jobs? A lot of jobs are meaningless doesn't mean you help corporations save a buck.

This is what I tell my boyfriend anytime there's a line at the cash register but not self-check out

Uhh yeah there's a camera there now, and literally my local grocery store of choice, Food Lion, fucking shows you your ass on its display screen. Which is basically saying "Fucking do it mother fucker, we dare you, we double dog dare you."

Grab two items, scan only one barcode. That's all I can say. /s

And I always prefer machines over humans

Just accidentally drop and break a gallon of milk on the self checkout machine. Then a human who isn't paid enough to live will take its place.

I suppose you might also leave trash at your seat in a movie theater or restaurant. After all, cleaning up is someone else's job and you don't even work there. Plus, you can pat yourself on the back for contributing to that person's job security with your added burden like some of the people here.

Do you actually talk do the cashier? I usually just say „hello”, „thank you”, and „goodbye”, that’s it.

I AM the human cashier when I do self-checkout. People don't care WHO or what does it, they themselves just don't want to.

In my supermarket you can go through stuff they picked for you and reject anything you don’t like.

I have witnessed far to many people with full carts que into the self check out, and than they get frustrated when every other thing they scan throws a flag.

Bitch, SCO is for 10 items or less!

Tucking the nozzle into my carussy

But we love it when you visit... (Camera cranes in for an unrequited hug.)

Hate to break this to you, but you are on the QTEE list and everyone is looking at your picture while they get coffee in the morning in the break room.

Just do like me and replay a Homestarrunner cartoon while waiting in line. Then reference it like the 18 year old at check out knows what the crap you are talking about.

'I'm sorry, Mergetrude, can you halp an old master gather his particles....?'