This is the same line of thinking as, "if everyone drove like me, there'd be no traffic," (a phrase used exclusively by terrible drivers).

Oh nice. I've heard of a fundamental attribution error before but didnt realise it was this.

You commonly see it written as "we judge ourselves by our inte twins but others by their actions".

Using the examples in that wikipedia page, if we are late for work it doesn't matter because we intended to be on time. If others are late it indicates a lack of planning or dedication.

If clones all have the same citizenship, can only one of them be arrested for the crime.

If that happens, you just wait in your row until the plane is empty.

It shouldn't at all be a surprise, since Covid, reports of "air rage incidents" spiked about 1000% and then remained elevated ever since.

People are no longer able to be in enclosed spaces with each other because everyone is paranoid of everyone else, mental problems don't get treatment, they get communities of supporters, and every American has a custom algorithm that feeds them specific, atomizing perspectives of a world we once all shared. Even basic decency is out the window because we are abandoning any sense of community with our fellow citizens.

I just had this yesterday! Was literally standing up out of my aisle seat and some boomer lady literally pushed me aside to get off the plane. I'm hoping she had another plane to catch, but goddamn you were one row away, we're talking maybe 30 more seconds here.

of course. bottled water salesman.

No. It turns out driving and grabbing a bag while walking are actually very different activities.

How about you accelerate yours a bit

I can’t remember a time in the last 30 years where things were different. People have always sucked.

The guys in front of and behind you are thinking the exactly same thing.

Or knives.

just say you have a connection?

Just stop flying altogether, we're in the middle of a worsening climate crisis. We can't afford ourselves to fly anymore.

That's why I fly business only. If I can't afford for business class I don't fly, simple as that.

Funnily enough, TikTok and the like are probably a huge part of having not much patience, I believe.

Consuming non-stop content that is only a few seconds long can't be good in the long run. (And yes I sound like an old man yelling at the cloud...)

If everyone drove like me there'd be no traffic. As I only pick up the car like once a month.

Listen, I've had to lift and carry 6ft2 elderly into and out of their seat and then the airplane specific wheelchair needed to have clearance to board the plane. It takes a minute. Not everybody is you, some people need help and others need a little extra time. Calm the fuck down.

I feel like I'm going crazy here with so many comments insisting the fastest way is to wait for everyone in front of them to go first. I could hardly engineer a slower way to go about it

To all the people telling OP they're wrong, you don't fly enough. The issue isn't evenly distributed. It's not like cars in traffic or whatever.

Airlines put the expensive seats in the front. The people who can afford them are usually much older, either traveling retirees or very late career white collar workers who have significant status. They're the first ones holding up everyone because they take forever to find all the assorted shit (personal item, oversized roller bag, neck pillow, laptop, ipad, lost earbud, etc) they've stuck all over the place, which the gate agent/FAs wouldn't admonish them for because of their aforementioned status. But they're first class, so the peasants behind them can wait in the bread line.

After they get off (on watching you glare), depending on airline, it's the fraction of people who are old and not rich, or don't fly often and aren't used to all the ritual. They'll have placed their bag in an overhead that's 12 rows behind them and demand everyone stop and crowd surf it up or else they'll just sit there blocking the line.

After them come the young vacation families, you know, the ones who had the screaming baby for the last 6 hours. They couldn't be bothered to pay for seat selection to save money so one parent is with one kid three rows ahead but needs to coral the kids behind them because the other parent was playing on a Nintendo switch for the whole flight and didn't try to organize all the kids toys, now lost to entropy, and so the marital spat and bawling (louder now) children begin.

Then there's you. You fly a lot so you have nothing more than two pairs of underwear and a toothbrush, all safely hidden from the TSA in your prison wallet and ready to go without so much as a nanosecond of notice, along with your phone and airpods to combat the screaming child in front of you. You got 31B, way in the back, after trying to game united's seat assignment system by checking in only after all but the exit row seats were taken, but someone missed their flight and here you are.

Generally the legacy airlines will have the most old people, but the vast majority of people on them are very used to flying, because they know better than to book a budget airline. It'll be slow yet ordered.

The budget airlines like united and frontier will be the opposite, lots of young spry 20 somethings, but lots of vacation families that couldn't afford Delta... I won't sugar coat it, it's gonna be a shit storm. The FAs have been contractually required to keep everyone at the very edge of their sanity through the enforcement of a variety of draconian company policies (like turning on all the lights half way through a redeye to scream about some credit card offer), so things are primed for chaos. Lots of shoving and yelling. Everyone's reviewing the Wikipedia "list of crimes of passion" to see if this qualifies.

Then there's spirit. Half the people on the flight will be coming down off of something they got on the dark web by the time you arrive at the gate. You've already seen at least a liter of blood spilled from various fist fights. Everyone was already up and crushing each other in the aisle long before the captain even briefed the approach. The FAs have locked themselves in the lavs by now and the captain (an FFDO) has barricaded the flight deck with charts and duct tape and is aiming his questionably modded P320 at he door. Welcome to the new season of Hunger Games - Spam Can. You're on your own, good luck and good hunting.